A conversation between Brianne and her very young nephew, as was told to me this morning. I can't stop laughing.

Nephew: My little sister has a potty mouth.

Brianne: Really? Does she say swear words?

Nephew: Yeah. She's been saying a really bad one lately.

Brianne: Which one?

Nephew: [Whispers] The F word.

Brianne: What?! No. She doesn't say the F word.

Nephew: Yes she does. I hear her saying it all the time lately. Sometimes she walks around the house yelling it.

Brianne: Buddy, I don't think she knows the F word.


Nephew: Yeah, she does. Because she keeps saying it.

Brianne: No. I think you might be confused. The F word is really bad and if she was saying it, someone would have talked to her about it by now.

Nephew: No, she's not saying the really bad F word. She saying the other one.

Brianne: [Pauses and thinks for a minute of what could possibly be the other one]. Which F word is "the other one?"

Nephew: You know. The girl F word.

Brianne: [Pauses and thinks again]. Do you mean the B word?

Nephew: No. It starts with an F.

Brianne: [Runs through all of the possibilities in her mind again]. Buddy, I don't know a "girl F word."

Nephew: [Whispers again] I'll spell it. It's the one that goes F-A-G--

Brianne: Oh no!

Nephew: I-N-A.

Brianne: Wait. What?

Nephew:You know. F-A-G-I-N-A.

Brianne:Fagina? Fagina? . . . Oh, FaJina?

Nephew: Yes! The girl F word.

In case it's not clear, he thought Vagina started with an F.

After several minutes of hysteria, wherein Brianne was nearly hospitalized for not breathing, she explained to the nephew the correct spelling of the word and why it's not actually a swear word. Then a few hours later while in a public place:

Niece: Ugh. My fagina's got an itch right now.

Brianne: Honey--maybe don't announce that.

Niece: Why? Is it a swear word?

Brianne: When you say it like that, almost.

~It Just Gets Stranger