Monday, September 28, 2009


The most dreaded part of my day anymore is when it's time to get the mail. This is because every day I have one or two rejection letters from firms I've applied to telling me that they would just die to have me even drive by their office and they are so impressed with my resume and unbelievable credentials, "However . . . blah blah blah . . . high number of applicants . . . blah blah blah . . . lowering the amount of summer associates . . . blah blah blah . . . you aren't nearly as impressive as all five million people that applied before you . . . blah blah blah . . . you should die . . . blah blah blah."

I always look forward to holidays now when mail is not delivered. I'm also usually relieved on the days when I don't get rejected from the firms whose names I've been doodling in my notebook with hearts and whose buildings I do drive-bys at nights just to see who's there. When those rejections come I usually spend the rest of my day having dramatic meltdowns and "my life is over speeches" that any 13 year old girl would be proud of. The comparison to middle school relationships is pretty accurate except instead of giving your giggly friends the "check-yes-or-no" note to pass along, you give it to the firms' recruiters to relay it to attorneys who then return their answer through the US postal service. And the meltdowns and rebounds that follow require just as much attention. Thank heavens for my friend Annette who was willing to bring me cheesecake during my worst episode last week.

But today something unusual happened; a firm that I applied to about a month ago sent a letter to my apartment addressed to "Ms. Eli McCann." I checked with my roommates who assured me that the BYU honor code prevents us from having any females live in the apartment. They also said they didn't know any Ms. Eli McCanns. So, despite the potential for committing a serious federal offense, I opened the letter. Unfortunately it seems that this California firm is not interested in Ms. McCann, "However, [they] are taking the liberty of keeping [her] resume in [their] file."

I feel really badly for this girl. But should I call the firm and see whether they're still interested in me? It's been a month and I haven't heard a single word.

~It Just Gets Stranger


  1. You make me laugh!

    I think you should make Ms. McCann a cheesecake. She could probably use some comfort food...

  2. Hang in there. Welcome to the real world of job searching. Things will work out just fine just be patient and keep working at it. It is just a matter of persistence and tenacity (sp). You will get a job keep working at it. Love Mom and Dad

  3. You are far better looking than that guy over there (this is me pointing to a guy in Tsaritsino park who is throwing a frisbee around with his friends in his underwear). And I guarantee more intelligent :)

    You are probably going to end up at some fabulous international firm where they need an incredibly good looking lawyer in their law and religion department who likes to get the new employee down the hall in public affairs to skip out on work early to go see the sights. Borscht and grechka coming right up!

  4. You are so remarkable.
    We'll all end up in just the right place. Rejection letters and all.
    Perhaps we should have a law school bonfire where we all bring every rejection letter we have and throw them all into the hot flames with ceremonial dancing and chants. I would like that.

  5. Why do companies keep addressing your letters as MS.? ? ?

    Eli isn't exactly a gender neutral name. Ridiculous.

  6. I was about to make a "your mom" comment, and then saw that she had already left a comment. anyway, time to update the blog, my friend.

  7. No, Eli. You are not an over-sharer. You share just enough to be hilarious.