I'm in the middle of a humor competition for attorneys and I'm supposed to send a short video of me attempting to be funny so a bunch of people can sit in a back room somewhere and judge me (it's high school social circles all over again). The top six from this round will compete in finals in New York at a comedy club in May. We'll be shooting the video this Thursday on The Porch at Muse Music in Provo. I didn't expect to be on The Porch again but I'm so excited to be back and would love to see some of you there (I would even love to see all of you there, but some of you are probably serial killers so maybe it's best to just have the "safe-for-societies" out). I've sent invites to Larry, The Queen of Colors, and The First Eye, but I'm not expecting much as none of them have ever really been there for me when I've needed it the most. Lohan will be there, of course. But that's just because he depends on living inside me to stay alive (bless his heart). Doors open at 7:30. Please come and laugh super hard, even if it's forced (I have no problem with fake laughter).
In other news, my good friend Matt sent me screen clippings of a recent text conversation he had with a seventh grade girl who texted him thinking he was a seventh grade boy she apparently has a seventh grade crush on. Below is the conversation. We love you Matt. And we all hope you don't end up on "To Catch a Predator" one day.