Monday, April 30, 2012

Strangest Human Names

Last Friday I went to the Facebook Page and asked you for the strangest name you've ever heard parents give their child. You did not disappoint. I think we're going to have to do more of these brain storms together. They make for a hysterical Friday. And by the way, if you haven't already, please hop on and LIKE the Facebook Page.

In other news, the Ironman is this weekend. More on that in a couple of days. Start praying and sending your good luck our way, please. I also heard it's super good luck to buy one of our very attractive t-shirts so I would consider doing that if you haven't already (shoot me an email if you have questions about sizes/shipping/etc.).

Strangest Names
(I included the first name of the person who submitted. And I deleted duplicates, in case you're wondering where your entry is)


1. Josh: "Sparkle Arckle"

2. Stacee: "He was actually a very cute guy.... Real Name... "Warrior Hunt". Very unique..."

3. Diana: "Amber Gurr... AND she had a brother named Vinny."

4. Michelle: "Sparkle Plumber... No joke"

5. Maret: "Aries B'Crimefighter."

6. Mike: "From Freakonomics: Lemawnjello, shuteed (edited for content)"

7. Shea: "Eli Whittle" [Cathie is going to be PISSED]

8. Tanya: "Tijuanna Hooker"

9. Erin: "Abcde, pronounced absedie and I had a friend whose legal name was Star* and her brother was Darth."

10. Elizabeth: "Sha-qua. The dash is not silent. So it is said Shadashqua."

11. Shalina: "Twins: sugar and kareme"

12. Jillian: "La-ah pronounced Ladasha. And twins Clover and Daffodil"

13. Britt: "Sprite"

14. Kelly: "Twins: Princess and Kitten, no joke."

15. Annalee: "Female (fee-mah-lay)."

16. Tracey: "Orangejello and Lemonjello. Accent on the 'a' and 'o'. Twins. And Asshole' pronounced A-shol-a."

17. Hailee: "Princess Paige (her parents let her older brother name her), Race Carr, Dow Jones, Dove Rainbow...you meet a lot of interesting people in North Idaho..."

18. Connie: "Ima June Bugg"

19. Shannon: "Michael Michaelson. (Kid I was a TA for in college. Poor guy.)"

20. Bobbie: "Moon Unit and Dweezle Zappa. The other odd one came from the dr that delivered the poor girl, Vagina, pronounced vajeena"

21. Tara: "Dick Allnut. He sold me my car. True story."

22. Daniel: "Toledo (Named for the place of conception. Toledo was a stop this couple took on their way to Disney Land, so the girl dogded a bullet)."

23. Cassidy: "Justa Cowgirl! Yikes"

24. Hailee: "Working in a preschool, too. I've had an Ark, Enzo (like Ferrari), Tegel (pronounced like Bagel). A newspaper here in Rexburg puts out the weirdest baby names at the end of every year, and this girl blogs about it. Good reading, though sadly lacking any mention of snuggies... http://jessica-jensen.blogspot.com/2012/04/names-2011.html"

25. Sharon: "Boaz Barfuss. (Note to families that have crappy last names: stick to names like "Mike" and "Julie" please.)"

26. Bobbie: "And one more, ESPN, pronounced espen."

27. Kimber: "Chlamydia. Yep. Like the std."

28. Bobbie: "Then there's the cowboy that named the boys Rope, Tie, and Cash. Yes, they all rodeo."

29. Meriah: "Arthur McCarthur, Niels Nielson, James Jameson, I HATE it when people do that to their kids, and I know every one of these people."

30. Pamela: "Anakin and Vader! A mother was calling out to her kids who came running out from around the corner :)"

31. Bethany: "Oh yeah I forgot Rock Haun."

32. Sarah: "Carla Carland and Russell Russell. I know these people personally."

33. Amber: "My friend named her kid's middle Danger. So he could say "my middle name is danger'"
34. Jodi: "La-a....pronounces Ladasha....INSANE!"

35. Alex: "My Grandma went to school with twins named Ima and Ura last name Pigg."
36. Suzanne: "Anti-Nephi-Lehi. Also Ufuk Tuna."

37. Cara: "Passion, Kindly, and Wisdom all from the same family."

38. Kirsten: "Epic Rhythm. Not sure what that's referring to... The poor kid!"

39. Kelli: "Floral Beaver. For real."

40. Catherine Fritz: "We named our second daughter Teal: Daddy's a duckhunter and a teal is a little duck. We were talking about how hunters name their sons Drake (male mallard) or, unisex, Hunter. I asked if there were any other girl duck names besides Suzy (female mallard), since we were having another girl, and my husband came up w/Teal."

41. Marian: "My son's friend's name is (yes, I'm serious) - Furious! Must have been what "Furious'" grandma said to his mom when hearing that her un-married daughter was pregnant???" 

42. Jessica: "Starship 5 Jemimah Judd. He's a boy. then Trixy Petunia Pineapple Judd , Sassafras Sapphire Safronia Judd. I'm not making this up. These are real names, all in the same family."

43. Jen: "Laquana ("la-qwa-na"), Mercedes, and Porsha."

44. Miranda: "Twin brother and sister named Odd and Even. The boy's name was Odd the girl's name was Even, she went by Eve. Poor Odd!"

45. Charlee: "Ernie Burt. Went to school with him."

46. Eva: "Sage Brush, poor girl."

47. Bryce: "Fortify . . . It's a beautiful name... here's the link to her blog she's a poet http://fortifyscorner.blogspot.com/"

48. Ashlee: "Audio science"

49. Kristie: "Ducky Pickles."

50. Serene: "Paime (prounouced Pay me) with the last name Friday. Sounds ridiculous when called out over the intercom at school."

51. Jen: "Snoop dog Chuckie. Not a joke."

52. Bruce: "Shithea`d...true story. How sad too. I felt so bad for the girl."

53. Elizabeth: "Eutus."

54. Becky: "Jett Storm... Sounds like a superhero. I went to school with Turquoise Brown and Amanda Dume (pronounced "do me")."

55. Cat: "Harry Richard Butts. Now, that may seem somewhat normal, except that the guy went by Dick...you know which for some odd reason is short for Richard. Total weirdo!"

56. Ryan: "I can confirm the one that has Trixie Petunia Pineapple, Sasafrass Saphire Sophronia, but the other one is Superstar Five Jemima and it's a girl, and they also have Falcon Jasper and the last name is Judd."

57. Kami: "Erith Brin, Tricity Boh."

58. Jessica: "Lasagna. No lie."

59. Cathie: "Mehitable Fish. It is in our genealogy."

60. Tasha: "B'Crimefighter"

61. Kristi: "Bowan Arrow. Not kidding."

62. Erin: "Hey, I met a guy named Odd the other day... Same one maybe? He served me my food at a restaurant and said, "Hi, I'm Odd and I'll be your waiter". I thought it was a really weird introduction until I read his name tag."

63. Nancy: "Shiton."

64. Chelsea: "Casper, and as if the name wasn't bad enough the poor kid can't do anything as good as his siblings."

65. Christy: "Theodore Bear (their real last name). They called him Teddy. Poor kid."

~It Just Gets Stranger

77 comments:

  1. I'm not allowed to post this to fb, because the friend will know I'm talking about her. One of my friends named her child... Axzel. Spelled just like that. I can't bring myself to say the name, so I refer to him as 'the baby' and 'him'.

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  2. I knew a kid named Seven. I guess his grandpa was Steven and wrote his name really sloppy in school, and it looked like Seven, so it became a nickname. They were kind enough to pass it on to this kid.

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  3. I met a family last week with children named Dynasty, Seraphim, and my favorite was the 5 year old named Tyrant. Legal names.

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  4. I have a friend who has 4 kids. Freedom (boy), Justice (girl), Legend (boy), and Kingdom Reign (Boy). Her name is Sunshine, brother named Star

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  5. My mom used to work at a bakery where they did birthday cakes every year for a girl named Latrina and a girl named Diarreesha. Lovely.

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  6. I knew someone who named their 5 kids the first five letters of the alphabet, spelled out (Ae, Bee, See, Dee, Eee).

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  7. My sister went to school with a girl named One Dottie. And I went to church with girls named Snow, Plum, and Tansy.

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  8. There was an exchange student at my high school that was named Tai mae Shu and it was pronounce "tie my shoe" It was great.

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  9. I used to work in human resources, so I saw some crazy names. The one that sticks out the most was Fartisia. There was also a Diareetha.

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  10. My mom named me Jaclyn Jill

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  11. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  12. I hired a locksmith named Nimrod once. True story.

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  13. Chanda Lier (prounounced chandelier)

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  14. I met a kid this summer named Dusty Grubbs. Poor thing.

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  15. I knew a girl named Anna Rexic. Sadly, she was very overweight. Also *La (starla) . yeah.. I know.

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  16. I went to school with a guy named Zip A-Dee-Do Daub. Not sure if I spelled the middle name right, but it's like the song, "My-oh-my, what a wonderful day!"

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    Replies
    1. I was just going to say the same thing, except that I went to RHS.

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  17. I went to school with twins Gram & Kilo. There was a September Love & Teal Rainwater. When parents name thier kids Patience, Charity, or Furious is that supposed to inspire that trait in the child or the parents?

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  18. I couldn't think of a thing last week when I saw this on facebook. But after reading the names today I'm reminded of the famous Hogg sisters of Texas. Ima Hogg and Ura Hogg. Ura Hogg didn't exist, but Ima did, bless her heart. She was actually quite lovely.

    When I was a girl in school, there was a girl in another town we played in sports. Her name was Button Ann Bowes.

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  19. I knew a family who named their chicken The Queen of Colors.

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  20. Oh yes, and apparently the kid with the name "Lasagna" was named for something both of his parents liked. Yikes! Also, I have some good friends I grew up with who are ~Misty Dawn Cloud~ and her husband ~Chris Blue Byrd~.

    Hey, good luck on the Ironman! Just keep in mind that I will be cursing the fact that any route that I take to work that day will be clogged with runners/people, but I will be thinking of you as I enjoy the air-conditioned comfort of the Levi's store. Just so you know. ;)

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  21. A couple we know named their son Andrew Ampersand Williams (A&W).

    Also, my hubby's cousin named their 6 kids with names like Journey, Canyon, and Logan (can't remember the others) and we could make a complete sentence out of their names.

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  22. I know a girl that named her twins Kia and Shia. (never name your twins rhyming names...) My neighbor grew up in New Zealand and went to school with twin boys named Starsky and Hutch.

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  23. I went to summer school with a girl called Silvery Blue...some horrid kids called her Slippery Poo instead.

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  24. I knew a girl named Lima ("Liney") Bean. And my cousin named his first boy "Fischer". I actually kind of like both names . . .

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  25. Went to school with a guy named Mighty Fine. My sister graduated with a guy named Michael Michael Michael.

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  26. Mercedes isn't a weird name; the car was named after the inventor's daughter, afterall.

    I know a Bentley and Embry. They're sisters. Wonder what baby brother's name will be once he's born?

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  27. Mercedes isn't a weird name; the car was named after the inventor's daughter, afterall.

    I know a Bentley and Embry. They're sisters. Wonder what baby brother's name will be once he's born?

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  28. I have a cousins whose names are Saneetha and Suntana… in fact it led to my grandpa giving every single one of us nicknames… so we call Suntana, jr for short, but we couldn't really shorted Saneetha

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  29. I just saw one on Pinterest. Someone's grandma is named Utahna.

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  30. I knew of a case in which the son's name was Heinekin and the daughter's name was Chardonnay.

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  31. My mother's cabinet builder's son (no, really) named his first born Orange Frederick Peel, Orange being a family name.

    Also, my friend named his daughter Aeris after the Final Fantasy character.

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  32. So I missed out yet again due to my all consuming hate of Facebook, but I would like to contribute: 1- a girl from my elementary school named Kristy Butt, her poor brother was named Harry 2- my friends niece is legally named Lucky Star and 3- my uncle named his daughter London and his son Bridger.

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  33. I missed out because I was insanely busy at work last week, but as a social worker I have met some kids with some crazy names. For example: Shanky DeBice (first and middle names; really nice kid though), Tantalaya, Shyteraquist, Arzaibrel, Maurtysheon, Shantanauja. So many syllables, so much going on in those names. And that just scratches the surface. I could go on and on.

    Then there's the people like Dave Davis and Will Williams. I'm all for classic names, but let's be a LITTLE creative.

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  34. My grandma was doing family history and getting ready to make some temple cards when she came across a Sexie Buttes. She called my mom to ask if it was appropriate to send it into the temple to have the work done for her. I SO WISH I COULD HAVE BEEN THERE when the temple patrons read her name!!!

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  35. It's crazy how the urban legends of the name la-ah or la-a (pronounced ladasha because "the dash don't be silent") and shithead are so widespread, but I constantly have people tell me their sister worked at a hospital where someone was named that, or their cousin taught a kid named that, but unless there are lots of kids with these unfortunate names out there, I believe these are both just urban legends.

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    1. Yes, I agree! Along with Orangello and Lemonjello. They're all on Snopes.

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  36. I know a gal named "Babylynn" and I went to grade school with a kid named Gonzalo Gonzales. people crack me up.

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  37. I met a family with daughters named Tequila and Chardonnay. Don't know if those were the spellings, but those were definitely the pronunciations.

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  38. I went to school with a girl named "Jamaica Love." Serious!

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  39. Hunter Shotwell. No joke. Also a family with the names Princessa, Honore, Charity, Lyric, and Fifi.

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  40. I went to school with a boy named Mohamed Mohamed. My mom knew some girls growning up with the last name Wieselfat, and my dad has a friend who has the worst last name of all time... If it were mine, I would change it, It's Popadick.

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    1. I know a crimpnfart.

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    2. No, you don't. There has never been anyone given "Crimpnfart" as a legal name (first, or last). I have extensive database access at work, and spent some time looking into this after your comment. Also, when you Google "crimpnfart" your comment is the ONLY page that comes up on the entire internet. Congrats- you very well may be the first person who EVER wrote "Crimpnfart" in print, online.

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  41. In Ecuador I met a man named D-max. Litterally.

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  42. I went to school with a girl named Honeycakes

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  43. I can also confirm the names mentioned in #42 and #56 (56 was correct about Superstar, by the way), and announce the newest addition to the family, Blackstone Bruce Leroy.

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  44. My son has a friend named Dam'N, pronounced Damon. Who does that to a kid?

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  45. Also, my husband gives anesthesia and a lady told him her kids were named Lemonjello and Orangello...the first thing she ate after giving birth. NO LIE...in Philadelphia.

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    1. The "Lemonjello" and "Orangejello" names are both widespread Urban Legends, with the same explanation (what the mother ate after birth). While I'm not implying your husband is lying, if this was said to him by a patient, she was joking (and most likely loopy from the anesthesia!). Several different publications looked into this (going as far to search birth records and social security databases in all states), and there are no records, meaning no child has ever been legally named Lemonjello or Orangejello.

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  46. A spring day at Hogle Zoo means a lot of elementary kids with field trip name tags. I saw boys named Cruiser, Ocean, Sirr, Ninja, and a skinny redhead named Titan.

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  47. Mercedes was a name before it was a car. Other than that, these are spectacularly bad.

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    1. Yes! People often overlook this. The car manufacturer named the vehicle line after his daughter. I think it's a pretty name, however it's gathered a rather "trashy" reputation, and obviously the first thing people think when hearing it is a car. I'd pass on it for a name.

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  48. My best friend named her son Bently Raider... yes, after the football team.

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  49. My dad has a large family, they all grew up in Utah. And let's have a look at their names:
    Elaine (normal)
    Gaylin (fairly normal)
    Lavona
    Arlana
    Weldon (Well done!)
    Deanna
    Norman
    Ardell
    Marlyn

    Now let's look at some of the names of the grand children and great grandchildren...

    Nephi, Lehi, Jarom, Samuel, Moroni, Alma and Becky-- all in one family
    Darion & Tanesha (twins and suuuuuper pale red-heads)
    Bently
    Addie
    Troy
    Christy Ann, Julie Ann, Ruth Ann, Kari Ann, Suzie Ann and McKay (all from one family)

    Let's just say I fully intend to name my children incredibly normal, traditional names.

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  50. My neighbour is pregnant with a girl, their last name is Atilia. I almost have them convinced they should name their baby Jen.

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  51. Wow, #59 is also in my genealogy. Whoever sent that in must be a distant relative of mine.

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  52. Theres a guy named Handsome that works at a World Market in my town. He asked me if i needed any help and i said "no thanks Handsome!" and my husband busted up laughing. He didn't see his name tag and Handsome was not handsome and my husband thought i was making fun of the poor guy...

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  53. there was a student my mom once taught: first name "Mister" last name "Rogers". no joke.

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  54. My mom's neighbor named their son Maximum Overdrive. When I was working in a pharmacy, I came across a little girl named Erotica. Three guesses as to what mom's career choice was.

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  55. Well, where should I start? My moms best friend named her twins ( a boy and girl) Justice and Liberty. Also another one of her friends named their daughter Golden Clover Pixie. And my baby cousins middle name is Danger. His dad ovbiously got to pick it.

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  56. I have friends that named their kid Otto Maddox (first and last name) As in Automatics, because the dad is a mechanic. But the baby alas was not born an Auto-Bot.

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  57. When I started reading this post, I was worried about what I would find (I'm always hesitant when it comes to talking about weird names), but I think I actually have some names to contribute. My mom went to school with a Koko Head and Panda Head, brother and sister respectively.

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  58. I was a little concerned I would see my own maiden name here! Glad to see it absent from the list!

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  59. For years my Father worked with two brothers, Dick and Hiney Pheeler.

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  60. I have a male friend named Justis Byrd. Not only are both his first and last names misspelled, but his middle name is Craig. Which happens to be where eagles live. I can only assume his parents worked in the local tourist industry showing off our town's bald eagle cliffs...

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  61. I once met someone named Justin Case.

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  62. My college roommate at SUU was Shannon Shannon. (Sorry, Shannon)

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  63. I went to high school (Bishop Feehan in Attleboro, MA) with a Jillian Dillian. She was a 2 years ahead of me. However I think it was spelled Jillian Dillon from Plainville, MA. Everyone called her Jill Dill. I just searched her online and she's married to someone named Sam Samg. LOL Jill Dill and Sam Sam. But omg they have the cutest kids!!!

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  64. One of my friends met a lady in Florida who named her daughter Pajamas pronounced pa-jumuss with the accent on the PA part. Apparently she was looking at a Sears Catalog when she was pregnant.

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  65. I went to school with someone named ThankGod, PrinceWill, and Understanding.

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  66. There are sisters at my school named Miracle and Dynasty.

    I've been to school with boys named Money and Profit who I believe were cousins.

    And there's a pastor named Creflo Dollar.

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    1. Oh, and my brother goes to school with cousins named Nefarious and Malachi.

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  67. My wife in an RN in a Labor and Delivery unit at a hospital. One thing I've learned from her: you can't make assumptions about "oh, how did the parents do that to their kids?" Many, many times its kids HAVING kids. She tells me all the time about a 14, 13 or even 12 year old coming in to give birth. One 16 year old girl named her son G-Money just to piss off her own mom. SMH.

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  68. I went to school with a Cash Nichols. His sister was Penny.

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  69. My friend just named her son Bohemian. Why oh why!?!

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  70. There were two kids at my school named Phoebina (basically Phoebe with an unnecessary -ina at the end) and Demon (pronounced day-MAWN).

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