Monday, February 11, 2013

Lifetime Movie Line-Up

Today I got an email from my sister Krisanda. Krisanda is the creator of The First Eye. And this is the sister who made me believe she and I were half Mexican until well into my teens. And the sister who convinced me that we had an older sister named Christina who was killed in a car accident on her way home from a beauty pageant and ever since she has haunted my parents' basement wearing her tiara and singing "I Will Always Love You."

Krisanda is the reason I'm still afraid of basements.

Her email today came with a picture.




And the following explanation: "Lifetime movie line-up for the day. Could today get any better? Actually, yes. If they just add 'My Breast' after 'A Stranger At My Door' it will be perfect."

Krisanda and I used to play a game when we were teenagers where one of us would read the names of 4 movies from the TV Guide and the other would have to guess which of the 4 was the Lifetime movie. She also used to occasionally entertain the family with a reading of the Lifetime movie line-up, which she would do in a provocative smoker's voice. "My Breast" was always a family favorite. And you TOTALLY just read "My Breast" in a provocative smoker's voice.

Keep making us proud, Krisanda. You and your 1/4 Mexican children.

~It Just Gets Stranger

8 comments:

  1. Can I please be in your family? I remember one from a long time ago my family still jokes about. I think it was called "A Student in the Teacher's Bedroom" or something.

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  2. My older brother had to read My Brother Sam Is Dead for school when we were kids -- it was from that book that we go the idea to convince our younger brother that we had another brother, Sam, who was dead.

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    1. That was my favorite book in the 6th grade. My best friend (who was actually named Sam) and I used to reenact chapters of that book at recess. And THAT'S why I still can't play any sports.

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  3. I have a friend who says that every Lifetime movie could be titled "I want my baby back" - no matter the plot, that title always works.

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  4. "Not Without My Daughter Who is Having Sex too Young and I'm Being Stalked by my Dentist." That seems to be every movie on lifetime...

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    1. Hahahaha!!! I think I've seen that movie on Lifetime.

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  5. Don't forget "Too Young to be a Father" and "16 and Pregnant". I am going to see if I can get a job writing Lifetime movie titles. Wouldn't that be soooo fun!?!?!?

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  6. As a joke I bought my friend a gift for her birthday - a DVD with 5 Lifetime movie "favorites." For Christmas this year I got a DVD set - "20 Lifetime Movie Favorites."

    She may have won the battle, but I will win the war!!!

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