Tuesday, April 16, 2013

The DMV

On Monday I went to the DMV to renew my license and to register my U.S. car.

Rather, I was taken to the DMV by Bob. My parent and guardian.

Bob was kind enough to take time out of his schedule to drive me over there, since I couldn't drive my own car as the whole reason we were going was to register it and get a valid license.

Guys, I swear I was 16 years old that day.

Bob and Cathie are helpful people. They can't help but be helpful. They're not bossy. They're not know-it-alls. They just step in and help out whenever they see an opportunity.

That's exactly what happened at that DMV on Monday when Bob stepped up to the counter before I could, pointed at me, HIS TWENTY-EIGHT YEAR OLD SON WHO DOESN'T EVEN LIVE IN THE UNITED STATES, and said, "my son here needs to get his car registered. What do you need from us?"


I tried to intervene, but it was too late. This transaction was between Bob and the lady at the DMV at this point.

The lady asked Bob whether I had the documentation she needed. Bob, in fact, had it, and he handed it over. The two engaged in pleasant conversation as the transaction proceeded. I tried to get involved in at least the polite banter, but have you ever tried to inject yourself in a conversation with two people who don't care to include you?

Thanks a lot, Bob.

We then had to walk over to a different room to get the license situation figured out so on this one I thought I would get in first and make sure that the people knew that I could totally be a grown-up alls by myself. A grown-up who doesn't grow facial hair. And who is brought to the DMV by his dad.

But homegirl saw right through me and, I presume, couldn't take me seriously while a distinguished looking 60-year-old man stood next to me. So she directed her answers to my question to the both of us and the moment Bob spoke, I was cut out of the triangle of communication.

THERE WERE THREE PEOPLE STANDING THERE! Don't they know about the TRIANGLE of communication?! The triangle has THREE points. Where did these people get their bad public education anyway? The Queen of Colors School of Learning?

Whatever. Bob totally bought me ice cream on the way home for being so good at the DMV.

Am I alone in feeling like a teenager again every time I spend time with my parents?

~It Just Gets Stranger

35 comments:

  1. Does Cathie know Bob is contributing to the "new you" and getting you ice cream? This could be a problem. Don't worry though, we all love you just the way you are. :)

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    1. <3 Couldn't have put it better.

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  2. Dude, I am 40 years old and still referred to as a "kid" whenever I am around my mom and/or visit with extended family. It never ends. I used to get all irritated by it. (Yelling "I'm a big boy, dang it!" and stomping away in a huff.) But now I just allow plates of food to be prepared for me (although I usually feed myself) and get driven around everywhere (but thankfully I haven't needed the carseat for several years now).

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    1. My sister and I (who are 50 and 48) are still called "Judy's girls" by all our aunts and uncles (Judy is my mom). (Actually, I'm still only 47...for another week. Wow putting 48 down like that made me feel really old because then I thought, holy wow! I am 20, TWENTY years older than Eli...how the heck did that happen? and how is it I am always nodding in recognition when I read his life? ) I will now wander off and complete my mid-life (if I live to 94) crisis...at least I am still Judy's girl and not Judy's old daughter. ;)

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  3. I think even as a teenager my parents would have sent me to the DMV counter alone to work things out myself. I never thought to thank them for that.

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    1. Call now and tell them. I can hardly wait for the day my kids (now teenagers) thank me for something, anything!!

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  4. my parents wanted me to know how to do all that stuff, so they taught me the first time through and then stopped. I'm not sure if that makes them helpful or lazy :p

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  5. I literally never "grew up." I'm 5'3'' tall, and everyone else in my family, including younger cousins, are no shorter than 5'8''. I'm perpetually the little girl, even though I am 31, work 40 hrs a week, run my own lucrative side business, and have a kid of my own. It doesn't matter. I will always and forever be Little Lauren.

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    1. There are two Michaels in my family--my uncle Mike who is really short and skinny and in now in his 50s and my cousin Mike who is really tall and muscular and a big big guy. We still call my cousin "Baby Mike" because that is what he was called when he was born to distinguish him from the first Mike. He is about 5 inches and easily 75 pounds bigger than "Big Mike". LOL

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  6. Haha! I have to go to the DMV to get my license renewed this week too. I've been putting it off because I can't stand going in there! Sorry that the triangle of communication was broken for you, Eli. I will have to make sure to go alone so it doesn't happen to me!

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  7. Totally! Like last summer when my mom was tearing down the highway to get me to a 5K in time. And she dropped me off at the starting line, told me good luck, and kicked me out of the car. Teenager all over again! (Oh, I'm 28 and have been married for almost 5 years if that gives you a little more perspective ...)

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  8. This happens to me all the time! I am 28, but because I am single I am still treated as part of my mom's family at events. All my brothers and sisters and cousins have families and are treated like a group or their own but I never am.

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    1. Right there with you. Same exact situation. My mom even says sometimes "Isn't it past your bedtime?"

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    2. 33 years old here and I still get the "time to go to bed" from my dad. Really dad? I have only lived on my own for 12 years, and somewhere in there I must have been competent enough to know when my body was tired, brush my teeth, get into pj's and get into my own bed. Maybe in his mind I have just sat around on the couch all evening and have never slept since leaving their house? Geesh!!

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  9. All I can say is cherish it. I laughed one day my mom and I were at the hospital for my back one day and she was doing her usual mothering routine, I apparently embarrassed her when I called her mommy to the nurse on duty.
    I love my parents, and I find as I get older and watch them growing old, I suck in every second of attention I can, while I still can. My husband lost his parents when they were in their sixties and he misses them so much. He's taught me to enjoy every moment, even the ones I used to get annoyed by when I was younger. I think they're almost annoyed with me, I have to talk to them every day, whether they like it or not lol

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  10. My parents released me into the wild when I was 5. I don't relate to this.

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  11. My husband and I have been married for 2+ years. We bought and have been in our house for over a year and my mom still chimes in whenever we tell her what we're doing to it - moving a plant (really, anything with plants)? She doesn't approve. Painting? Doesn't like it. Re-doing the deck? Expresses doubt. I'm her youngest daughter and married first - I think she's having a hard time adjusting to having a child married and the fact that I make decisions with my husband and not just her.

    My older sister lived in Japan for 4 years, and when she came back they coddled her (for way too long). I guess they thought she'd forget stuff and did it for her... maybe it's the same with you?

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  12. I'm 55 and still call my kids (34, 31 and 28)"squirt". In public. They are all intelligent, educated, and able to fend for themselves, properly defend their own opinions, and tie their own shoes. As one might expect, there was some resistance to this mode of address during the formative years, especially during high school when the eldest was in biology class and finally figured out the genetic component. They expressed this resistance in a most satisfying way when I accompanied them to school functions, like band concerts and scholars bowl tournaments. Red faces, clenched teeth and cries of "Daaaad!" were not unheard-of, but they all outgrew it, and I'm now tighter with my grown children than almost all of my contemporaries. Cut Bob some slack, he loves you.

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  13. Recently, my some of my family had to get together and I grew up being the only girl (daughter, sister). Well, I wasn't asked if I wanted to do any of the driving and I had to do whatever my mom and my older brother told me to do... My teen years all over again. The plus side was my older brother got us lost and I used my navigator to get us back on track (mind you, there were a total of three vehicles following my older brother)! I loved, really loved telling my brother he had to follow my instructions! :)

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  14. When my parents took me to college my first year, my mom started introducing me as a "really shy girl who needs a friend." I'm not shy. I'm simply not talkative having grown up with seven VERY loud siblings. Now in my later twenties I'm referred to by my parents as one of their "big kids" (the youngest is still elementary age).

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  15. My mom started treating me like an adult when I was 7. Filling out insurance paperwork for the doctor is sure confusing when you're in third grade.

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  16. I will go to the DMV with your dad if it means I get ice cream when we are done. What are you complaining about Eli? Sounds like perfection to me. Being a grown up is way over rated!!

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  17. My husband ACTS like a teenager around his parents. Does that count?

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    1. YES! I totally relate to this. My normaly self-sufficient husband turns into a helpless infant the second he's around "mommy".

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  18. It has been my experience, my own life and those I know, that the moment our parents are around we become the child. No matter how independent our parents try to make us.

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  19. My mom is, and always will be, called "Helper Girl!" at home. (Make sure you pronounce it with the exclamation!) When we were kids and each of us had a different night to do the dishes (no dishwasher back in the day, because my mom gave birth to five of us), she'd pass through the kitchen and see that while we were busy washing, say, the cups, she'd see that the silverware was sitting there on the counter, not being soaked in the sink, and she'd rush over to my side while saying "I'm Helper Girl!" in a sing-song voice, and she'd add a bunch of dishes to the dishwater. (PS I hated having the forks in the sink because of the scraping sound they'd make along the bottom of my parents' old ceramic sink; worse than nails on a chalkboard, I say!) Mom would make herself "helpful" in all sorts of ways; sometimes the help was really nice, a lot of time it was a gigantic pain...

    Lately when I go home, I take my laundry with me (I know, what am I? In college?) because I recently moved to a new house and haven't afforded a washer and drier yet...and somehow, Mom just swoops in and starts doing my laundry. And I feel like a little kid, and I feel bad, because I'm NOT a little kid...but at the same time, it's nice having someone else do my laundry...and it's a very conflicting thing! Last time I went home (2 weeks ago?), I talked to my mom about it. I told her, "You don't need to do my laundry, woman!" Then she said, "You cook when you come home; if you cook whenever you come home, I'll gladly do your laudnry." So...yeah. I guess it's an even trade-off?

    I swear I digress when I'm back in my childhood home, though...

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  20. Ugh, this makes me laugh and cringe. I've been married for almost four months - not long, but still - and any time I go out with my mother anywhere when Husband is at work, I feel like a fourteen-year-old kid. (Technically, I am still a teenager.) People ask her questions about me, and it makes me mad. "So does she have an announcement to make? How is her husband doing with working and going to school? When are they going to move into their own place?" Asking questions about my husband and I that are none of their blinking business, as I am standing right there. Perfectly. capable. of. answering. those. questions. like. an. adult. thankyouverymuch.

    Thanks for the laugh, Stranger!

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  21. I can't stand to be home for more than a few days at a time, because I regress back to high school me. I also can't be around middle/high school kids for the same reason. All sorts of feelings of awkward start to overtake me and it's all...blurg. I hate it.

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  22. THREE DAYS without a blog from Eli...and Ial am SERIOUSLY going through withdrawls. I need something to laugh at or I might have a nervous breakdown. Please, please, please post something soon or I might end up at the local mental hospital, which has an amazing view of Walmart. I know this was intentional to keep people there longer. I need my STRANGER fix.

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  23. THREE DAYS without a blog from Eli...and Ial am SERIOUSLY going through withdrawls. I need something to laugh at or I might have a nervous breakdown. Please, please, please post something soon or I might end up at the local mental hospital, which has an amazing view of Walmart. I know this was intentional to keep people there longer. I need my STRANGER fix.

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  24. To answer your question: My mother Totally still treats me like a small child. On Thursday night when I saw you at the Story Telling show, I'd had a very small minor surgery earlier that day.
    So, obviously, it was not that big of a deal seeing as I was able to attend a show I didn't want to miss even when high on pain meds.
    BUT, the minute I get taken to my mom's house (brother insisted, even though I have a very comfy couch for him at my place)she spoils me rotten (which is totally awesome by the way) AND tries to talk me out of everything I need to get done that weekend. Granted I did end up having to cancel that 50 mile bike ride and that swim workout with the best friend, but I was perfectly able to fulfill my church calling thankyouverymuch.

    Great show, thank you for the laughs!
    Amanda Kirk

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  25. I feel for you. Try being a woman and going with your husband to buy a car. I swear, I never knew I had the power of invisibility. I am the one that pays the bills, but whatevs.

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  26. My dad's name is Bob and he acts the exact same way...So, I think it's safe to say we both have a dad leaving a double life. To that I say: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eo1pkHKHuts

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  27. At the risk of sounding like an elementary school math story problem...

    Eli is the third child of Bob and Cathie. If Eli is 28 and Bob is 60, why does Cathie think she should already have 10 grandchildren?

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