Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Pictures of Food EVERYWHERE

I have a new "what the kids are doing" to tell you about. There's this brand new thing that must have just started like within the last two months or something where you go onto what the kids are calling "the Internets" and you post pictures of yourself and your food. I don't know why they are doing this and I can only assume it's all about drugs and sex and it is for those reasons but I decided I should probably investigate it and find out what's going on so that you all won't be in the dark anymore.

It's called "the Instagram." And despite its VERY MISLEADING name, this is not a cookie that you get to eat instantly. I have been hearing people talk about this for a while and it piqued my interest much more when I thought it was a cookie.

"Eli, you should TOTALLY get Instagram."

"Instagram is the bomb.com."

"Eli, you are so awesome and I've never seen better hair on anyone else and don't listen to Cathie when she tells you that you look pale EVERY TIME she sees you and then asks if you're sick because she can't accept that that's your natural color."


What Instagram is is a place on the Internets where you go and just post pictures and let other people see them. So it's basically exactly like Pinterest, Facebook, the Twitter, Blogger, your refrigerator, telephone poles, and if you are anybody who goes to the same gym as me, a human body.

I got a the Instagrams account so that my 14 disappointed Twitter followers who get angry because I don't Tweet often can start getting angry that I don't post pictures often somewhere else. You can find me on the Instagrams here, posting out-of-focus pictures of my food. And while we're at it, you might as well join the group on Facebook, too. That's a piece of social media that I at least kind of know how to use.

Now every single time I get a new Instagram follower, my phone freaks out. And I always think it's a text message so I get excited because WHAT IF PAUL SIMON!? But then I find out that it's not a text from Paul Simon and instead it's just another person for whom I have a new responsibility to provide photographic evidence that I'm eating dinner. My life is stressful, guys.

Hashtag nofilter.

~It Just Gets Stranger


  1. There's a way to turn off all the notifications re: Instagram. Have someone help you, Eli.

    I'm about to follow you on Instagram in about 30 seconds; please don't be too disappointed when you check your phone and it doesn't say "Paul Simon."

  2. Once you take the appropriate amount of time ro figure out the ins and outs of the Instagrams (several months should do it), you should search for itjustgetsstranger tags. I bet there are already several!

  3. I can only imagine what a mess Instagram is about to become . . .

  4. I'm going to throw a monkey wrench into things..... Do you have a Pinterest account that we can all follow?

    1. Well I know I signed up for Pinterest once. But I didn't know one could "follow" another there, too. Are people following me? WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP FOLLOWING ME!?

    2. If Eli has pinterest I see his pins consisting of "DIY make your own Life size Paul Simon doll out of popsicle sticks and coffee cans!!" I Think I'll pass on following him on any other social networking sites....

  5. Thought I should warn you... According to Princeton, Facebook peaked in 2012 and will soon go the way of MySpace (did you have a MySpace account?) so you'll have to get warmed up for whatever is the next best thing on these crazy interwebz... which hopefully is Instragram... but who knows how long its half-life is...

    And stay away from Pinterest. Pinterest is the devil... it just exists to make us less than adequate folks feel even more so :-) :-) :-)

  6. So... what if somebody made an Instagram profile and put their name as Paul Simon. And then they followed you. And you would never know that it wasn't really Paul Simon... *evil grin* :)

  7. Eli, how did you know about Snapchat and Tinder before Instagram? Instagram is already like 3 years old! That's ANCIENT for the internet!

  8. Let the pictures of borscht and kittens flow!!!!

  9. I followed you on Instagram, then checked my account later in the day and saw that I had 2 new followers. I got so excited thinking that maybe Eli was following me now!!! Imagine my disappointment when that was not the case. I curled up with my 10 cats and cried myself to sleep. :-(

  10. Oh great, yet another venue for posting information that even my cat won't stand still long enough to see/hear.


    See, I don't understand 'Twitter' at all, but I have it set up to 'tweet' every time I post a new blog entry. I did that when I was setting up my blog, and now have NO idea how to change it. There are probably people following me, but I'm boring so that won't last long.

    I also can't remember how to update links on my blog, and one time I went days not updating my own blog because I couldn't remember the password...for...my...own...blog.

    At this thing you kids call the "interwebbies" I sucketh.

  11. Dear Eli, I just followed you on Instagram. I am not Paul Simon. I apologize for any trauma this may cause you.

  12. Definitely following now. And I almost changed my screen name temporarily to Paul Simon just to freak you out. But then I decided that was mean...