First of all, WHO THE HELL WROTE THAT SUPER DRAMATIC POST ON SUNDAY!?

Second, you guys. I am leaving for Ironman on Friday morning.

FRIDAY MORNING.

THAT'S THE DAY AFTER THURSDAY! AND THURSDAY HAPPENS ALMOST EVERY SINGLE WEEK!

I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF I'M MAKING SENSE ANYMORE!

Ironman is a logistics nightmare. I have to check in at the Tahoe race by 5:00 PM on Friday but because my job has recently turned into the neediest thing since me, I can't leave for the 9-hour drive until Friday morning. Which means that we are going to leave at like 4:30 AM just to be safe.

FOUR-THIRTY. AY. EM!!! WHEN IT IS AGAINST THE LAW TO BE AWAKE!


Don't question me on that. Now is not the time to become one of those people who demands citations for everything.

I have to be awake at the witching hour! [Eli crosses himself and then remembers he's not Catholic and then uncrosses himself and then remembers that some people on his last post commented that he basically isn't a Mormon either so he crosses himself again just in case and then does some black magic]

And before I leave I need to gather all of the possessions I own and fit them into my car.

It is unbelievable how much crap you have to take with you to the Ironman. This includes bike, bike gear, running gear, wetsuit, food, medical supplies, a mallet to knock myself unconscious 8 hours into the race, etc.

Also, I'm freaking out about what clothes to bring because apparently it's going to be freaking cold and the only thing I know how to wear when it's freaking cold is my glorious blue Snuggie.

BUT WHAT IF IT GETS DIRTY?!

Do you think it's too late to get Snuggie to sponsor me for this race?

I don't know why I do this. I don't know why I do this.

Maybe it's so I can feel young again.

That joke is less funny now that I'm 30. And I'm guessing it will be even less funny when I'm 40.

Oh my gosh! What if I have to start coming up with new jokes?!?

I better take October off of work to think about this.

~It Just Gets Stranger