Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Flat Tire

Ring ring

Eli: Yes, sister?

Krishelle: Well I don't know what else to do. Everything is a mess.

Eli: Want to go back a little and give me some context?

Krishelle: I'm under an overpass and I'm probably going to die here and no one will help me and . . . just a sec . . . [clearly yelling to someone else] no, thank you sir! I just have a flat tire. But my brother is going to come and help me . . . no, really . . . I don't need any help. He's on his way. Thank you, though!

Eli: You have a flat tire somewhere?

Krishelle: Not just "somewhere." I have a flat tire on my car.

Eli: And you don't know how to change it?

Krishelle: I have no idea and I'm wearing nice clothes and I'm under an overpass and NOBODY will help me.

Eli: It kind of sounds like someone just tried to help you.

Krishelle: Anyway, I called Jeff and then a dozen other people and no one is answering and I just don't know who else to call so I called you.

Eli: Am I your last resort?

Krishelle: Yes.

Eli: I feel offended right now.

Krishelle: Well, you just don't seem like the kind of person who has ever changed a tire before?

Eli: I've changed a lot of bike tires.

Krishelle: I don't think those skills translate.

Eli: Why don't you call Bob and Cathie? They somehow know how to do everything.

Krishelle: Oh I can't call them. A few years ago they tried to teach me how to change a tire but I was really teenagery about it and so I just rolled my eyes the whole time and said "I know" a lot. But I didn't know and I didn't pay attention.

Eli: Why didn't you pay attention?

Krishelle: I just never thought it would be applicable in my life.

Eli: Ok. Where are you?

Krishelle: Under an overpass.

Eli: Can you be any more specific than that.

Krishelle: Utah.

Eli: Seriously. I can't help you if you can't tell me where you are.

Krishelle: Oh! I can send you a pin to your phone!

Pin received. She is, in fact, under an overpass, 25 minutes away. Eli arrives and discovers that Krishelle does not have all of the necessary tools to change a tire.

Eli: You don't have all of the necessary tools to change a tire.

Krishelle: Oh and so this all MY fault?!

Eli: Yes.

Just then, a man pulls up.

Man: Do you need any help?

Krishelle: No thank you! My brother is here to help me!

Eli: Seriously, Krishelle!? Yes, sir. We could use some help.

Man gets out of the car, retrieves a surprising number of industrial tools perfect for changing a tire, and finishes the job while we stand around a watch.

Krishelle: Thank you so much for your help, sir!

Man: No problem.

Krishelle: Hopefully my brother learned his lesson on the importance of being prepared for emergencies.

Man: Tsk tsk.

Eli: Seriously? How did I end up being the bad guy in this situation?

Krishelle: I don't know. But can we agree to not tell Bob and Cathie about this?

Eli: Yes.

Eli blogs the experience for Bob and Cathie to see.

~It Just Gets Stranger


  1. Replies
    1. You are the family gossip. Dad called me immediately to get the details.

  2. Ok, there may be a few things I'd like to dispute about this story, for instance: I'm a lot smarter than this made me sound, and I definitely have much better hair and a nicer tan than you let on, BUT THANK YOU so much for coming to help me!! You were a life saver! (And that first man who asked if I needed help was scary and I was alone. You would have felt terrible had something happened to me, your favorite sister.)

    1. See. I enjoy when the other person tells there side of the story. Although you are related to Eli so I'm not sure if exaggeration is in your blood or not. So really there's no way of knowing, in this instance, who is telling the truth. Although I may have to side with Krishelle on who has better hair.

      On the topic of tire changing though. I had never changed one and was terrified of not doing it properly until I actually just did it. Unless one of the lug nuts are stuck, it's pretty easy to do.

  3. "I definitely have much better hair." I hope she is not alleging her hair is better than yours. I hope she meant her hair is nicer than you admit. Because Eli has post Iron Man energy to burn, and he will not hesitate to take to the internets to defend the good name of his hair.

    But we're all so glad you are ok, Krishelle! Tell Eli we need to hear updates on Daniel, Jolyn Metro, and Rebecca. Oh, and we need back to school pics of the niece that hates him.

  4. When I read this, my imagination could only view it with roles reversed--I see Eli under the overpass and Krishelle coming to the rescue. Glad you're okay, Krishelle (or was it Eli?).

    There's a special place in heaven for those angels who have tools and stop to change tires for us woebegone folks who never learned how (to the angel who stopped to help me in middleofnowheregoshawfulEastTexas and changed my tire: I will never forget you!).

    1. Yes, I thought the same thing (Krishelle coming to Eli's rescue), but since she didn't correct that detail when she commented on the story, I guess we better believe Eli.

  5. Could someone explain to me what exactly a pin is and how to use one?

    1. A pin is a thin piece of metal with a sharp point at one end and a round head at the other, used especially for fastening pieces of cloth. You can also use a pin for sticking things to a cork board or against a wall.


      I believe in this case she used the map on her phone and put a "pin" at the point she was at on the map, then sent it to Eli so he could see where she was.

  6. My brother is pretty much the last person I'd call in a tire changing emergency too. I *think* he probably knows what to do, but he's always wearing nice clothes.

  7. Oh heaven sakes....just glad everything is ok. Hate when you kids have problems! Xoxoxo

  8. Don't emasculate yourself, Buddy. I know you're really a mans man at heart and could change a tire on a tractor-trailer without a jack. Yes, you spend a lot of time talking about your hair, post selfies featuring your duck face and shaved body, and like clockwork once a month post an overly emotional self reflection post. But I know there's a Ron Swanson yearning to come out. Thanks for the play by play of your evening !

  9. you all don't know anything - what you need is a grey wig in the car - for some reason all kinds of people will stop to help grey-haired old ladies - I wear mine all the time -