Tuesday, June 6, 2017

Life Changing Library

Skylar: That reminds me.

Eli: Of what?

Skylar: Of that time in the library when that guy tried to change my life.

Eli: Ok. You've piqued my interest. Go on.

Skylar: I was in college. It was a winter day. I was standing in line when a mysterious man turned to me and tried to change my life.

Eli: How did he try to change your life?

Skylar: By saying something.

Eli: By saying what?

Skylar: Something ominous. 

Eli: This story is killing me. 

Skylar: He did it with one sentence. 

Eli: Say the thing!

Skylar: I was a student at Boston College.

Eli: I feel like this story is going backwards.

Skylar: Our mascot was the Eagles.

Eli: That better be relevant to the point of this story or I will murder you.

Skylar: And that's when he said it.

Eli: With sharp weapons. I will murder you with sharp weapons.

Skylar: He said it with a deep and booming voice.

Eli: With my new knife set. 

Skylar: And he was completely serious when he said it, too.

Eli: I'm losing the will to live.

Skylar: He had the kind of voice that can pierce souls. 

Eli: I don't even care anymore.

Skylar: He said, "you've got to study like an owl--"

Eli: Stop.

Skylar: "if you want to soar like an Eagle."

Eli: I hate this.

Skylar: And when I turned around--

Eli: No.

Skylar: I saw--

Eli: I don't care what you saw.

Skylar: that it was Morgan Freeman.

Eli: . . . 

Skylar: . . . 

Eli: . . . 

Skylar: . . . 

Eli: And this changed your life?

Skylar: The experience had no effect on me.

Skylar in college, learning how to study like an owl.

~It Just Gets Stranger


  1. What on earth reminded him of this?

  2. He tells stories like you sometimes do on Stranger. I DON'T LIKE THE SUSPENSE JUST TELL US HOW YOU ENDED UP NAKED OK?!

  3. I saw Skylar on a flight this past weekend and introduced myself. Tell him sorry for startling him. I'm not creepy, I promise.

    1. I heard about this. He called to tell me he was famous and when I tried to respond he cut me off by yelling "I DON'T TALK TO THE HELP." So thanks for that.

  4. What!?! Morgan Freeman personally talked to Skylar in college, and it had NO effect on him? I don't believe him. If he has remembered the experience thus far, that little statement has been lodged somewhere inside his consciousness where it randomly gets replayed.

    1. I should note that Skylar calls every person he doesn't know "Morgan Freeman" or "Diane Sawyer."

    2. LOL. The comments section is my favorite thing on Stranger.

    3. Anonymous has clearly never basked in the glory of Eli's hair and laid eyes on a single picture of Mr. Doodle!

  5. I love the image of a stranger offering this unsolicited advice.

  6. I still can't decide whether that's a real photo of Skylar.

    And I'm sure she isn't, but the cup placement makes it appear like that super cute little girl drinking Samuel Adams.

    1. I thought the same thing about the little girl drinking a beer!!!!

    2. This comment has been removed by the author.

  7. Not that we know what Samuel Adams is, Kathy!!!

  8. I'm still stuck on "You've got to study like an owl" bit. What does that even mean? I just keep picturing people eating their homework and then throwing it up again as pellets like an owl.

  9. Was it actually Morgan Freeman or was it like that time in Juno when Ellen Page's friend said, "Juno?" and she said, "No, it's Morgan Freeman."

  10. Is that little girl Morgan Freeman? If so my facial blindness is way worse than I have previously thought. And are they in a library or a bar, I'm so confused.

  11. Seriously .. one liners always