Skylar called me at 9:14 this morning. "Can you give me some Bible verse about arrogance?" he asked.
"Huh?" I was in the middle of responding to a work email and it took a moment or two for me to register what he was asking. "You want me to quote the Bible at you?"
"Yes. Hurry. I need a Bible verse now," he said, honestly in a tone of urgent solemnity, like he was out to save lives and souls.
"Uh. Wickedness never was happiness?"
"No," he barked at me. "I need something specific about arrogance. I need to understand what that book says about arrogance."
That book. It's an improvement from what I heard him call it a few years ago during a conversation about major world religions: "Novel."
"Ok. Let me think a second. I haven't really done any of this for a while . . ." I started to say.
"Didn't you read the Bible for like 3 hours a day until you were 30?" he asked me, demonstrating that I still, apparently, after all these years, have not been able to give him an accurate representation of a religious person's life.
"I've got it. 'Pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty spirit before the fall.' Proverbs 16:18."
Skylar started mumbling the verse back at me in a way that it became clear he was writing this down. " . . . and a hot spirit before fall," I heard him say.
"No. Not a 'hot spirit.' A 'HAUGHTY' spirit. And it's 'the fall.' Not 'fall' as in the season." I corrected him.
I was shushed.
"What is this even for? Why am I spending time on this right now?" I asked.
"Why am I spending time on this right now?" is a question I ask him frequently in my house. I rarely receive a satisfactory answer.
He hung up on me and ten minutes later I got a text. "I'm appealing a parking ticket," he said. "Here's my appeal."
This man is so exhausting.
Please enjoy some Strangerville:
This time in Strangerville, Eli decided to go to SNL and the Swifties were RUTHLESS, Meg is not wearing a bra, and the story of a mishap that occurred on what should have been a very pleasant walk.
Walking The Dog, by Eli McCann (music by The Trumpeteers)
Production by Eli McCann & Meg Walter
Join our Patreon!
~It Just Gets Stranger