Somehow in January I totally forgot to give you the annual "Worst Things Ever" list. It's like I wasn't even focused on complaining last month. What was I doing? Reading books and enjoying the weather?
Hahahaha. I couldn't even say that with a straight face.
The 2014 Worst Things Ever
1. Glee
2. When you have an itch on a hard-to-reach place on your back and nobody on the bus will help you
3. Driving in the snow
4. When you accidentally swallow a fruit snack right after you put it in your mouth
5. Training for an Ironman
6. That Paul Simon is on tour right now and I'm not with him
7. That Downton Abbey doesn't have 1200 episodes in each season
8. When an unknown number calls your phone and you're expecting an important call from an unknown number so you have to answer it
9. The way your clothes smell after walking anywhere near a Subway restaurant
10. Laundry
11. The Queen of Colors
12. February
13. Chewing raw spinach
14. Awake/awoken/woken up. WHICH IS IT?!
15. Living in the same city as Jolyn on April Fools' Day
16. When you start dating someone and then find out they have a cat
17. Watching a movie with your parents that you didn't know was going to be chock full of sexual innuendo
18. When Cathie asks you to explain half of the sexual innuendo in said movie and then follows up your very tame explanation with an exasperated "AND HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS, YOUNG MAN?!" And you're almost 30.
19. The old woman who keeps setting the heat to 90 degrees in the lobby of my apartment building
20. Doodling on a document at work that you didn't realize you were going to have to give back to a superior
21. The fact that every time I walk by a dumpster I feel like Leotrix is going to jump out at me
22. When people use "twice up the barrel, once down the side" incorrectly (just kidding! Not even possible! You guys looked so twice up the barrel, once down the side though for a second!)
23. When you sit on a cushioned seat in a public place and find out it's damp
24. When someone delivers really tragic news and you feel the uncontrollable urge to smile or laugh just because you know that this would be the most inappropriate time to smile or laugh
25. Smelling like campfire
Ok, your turn. Let's hear it. Your 2014 Worst Things Ever addition.
~It Just Gets Stranger
The 2014 Worst Things Ever
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