Over the past several days I've been in southern California and northern Mexico, visiting family and attempting to find the seemingly ever elusive hand-made flour tortillas.

Guys. I don't require much in this life. Just really nice things, constant praise, 5 hours of direct eye contact every day with Paul Simon while we read one another the vows we have tattooed onto our chests and torsos, and an infinite supply of fresh hand-made flour tortillas from Mexico.

There's this place in Rosarito where a woman named Maria makes them all day and Krishelle, Will, and I will typically stand in front of her tortilla stand with our hands outstretched for hours on end every time we go. We tried to make these tortillas ourselves at home once but when we got back to Salt Lake City last time and went to the store, they didn't have all of the ingredients.

Maria's Handmade Tortilla Recipe

1. Lard
2. Flour
3. Maria

This trip we were in San Felipe, which did NOT have all of the ingredients either.

Fortunately the trip was still wonderful, mostly because I got to visit my 83-year-old grandma, whom I haven't seen in about a year and a half. This woman is my kindred spirit. And not just because the first thing she said to me when we walked through the door was, "Oh good. You're here. I've been looking forward to a late night of clubbin' all week."

Every time Krishelle, Will, and I go visit Grandma, we always laugh about one of our favorite Grandma memories, which happened about five years ago.

Krishelle and Will had arrived at her house and when she opened the front door to let them in, a small lizard made its way in. Grandma, with apparently much higher standards than I have, immediately put her hands to her face and started saying in her always sweet voice, "Oh my goodness! I'm so embarrassed! How embarrassing! A lizard just came into MY HOUSE!"

Will was able to direct it back outside with a broom and in the process the lizard's tail came off (I'm told this is some kind of defense mechanism?).

Grandma yelled, "Oh dear! That poor poor thing!"

Will responded, "Don't worry mom. It will grow another one."

Grandma pointed at the tail and emphatically asked, "that tail is going to grow another lizard?!"

~It Just Gets Stranger