I'm losing it. Attempting to be diligent since I have missed the last THREE weeks of trash pickup, I just hauled my garbage and recycling bins out the curb. I was really impressed with how responsible I was being, especially considering that I seemed to beat all of my neighbors to it. As I walked back up the driveway, my next door neighbor called out to me from his front lawn.

Neighbor: So . . . you getting special treatment?

Eli: Excuse me?

Neighbor: Garbage pick up on a Friday?

Eli: Wait. Today isn't Tuesday?

Neighbor: Uh . . . no.

*Walks back to the curb to retrieve the bins. Makes the "I meant to do that" face to the neighbor.*

Fortunately I've turned into a hippie lately where I'm trying to be a minimalist about waste so the bins are not actually overflowing yet. Hashtag save the planet.

And now, your Pictures and Distractions:

Remember this "before" picture of my kitchen just after I moved into the house?

Well the island was completed this morning! (I'm having a really hard time getting a good picture of it because angles and incompetence. Just trust me. It looks amazing. You should all be hiring me right now to decorate your houses. And do your hair.)

Another terrible and marginally different picture of the island.

And from the other side.

Rebecca played with Mr. Ollie Pants today while Matt was at work. She tortured me with pictures like this one.

And this one.

Also, this is NOT funny. I bet you laughed at the kick a ginger picture from last week too!

Crap to distract you from whatever you're supposed to be doing:

The 25 greatest pictures ever taken on Splash Mountain. Thanks, Brad.

When your mayor has to ask you to stop jumping out of windows into snow, things have gotten bad. Thanks, Jacob.

And while we're at it, pictures showing where all of Utah's snow this year has ended up. Thanks, Jacob.

Things worried people do. I'm concerned someone followed me around to come up with this list. Which is another thing that should be on the list. Thanks, Ryan.

Zombie cat crawls out of the ground after being hit by a car. Thanks, Krishelle.

Binge-watching TV shows may be a sign of mental health issues. DON'T SHOOT THE MESSENGER. Thanks, Krishelle.

Nearly 2,000 days of solar activity in 5 minutes. Thanks, Desiree.

Oh my gosh. I wonder if I still have the "JNCO" Jeans Cathie made for me in the seventh grade because I wanted to fit in! Hashtag hippie Mormon Pioneer Mom. Thanks, Justin.

What happens to your brain when you give up sugar. Thanks, Kim.

And good news. You can now sue yourself in Utah. (Does it make me part of the "problem" that I think this is a good result?) Thanks, Matt.

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~It Just Gets Stranger