Ironman Not Far from the Tree Years of speculation that I might be adopted were suddenly halted on Sunday when I watched Bob attempt to use technology. My sister Krishelle and I sat in the back seat of his car while Cathie subtly mocked his repeated failed attempts to use
Ironman Omelets Another week of training is rounding out to be another dark mark on my past. I kid. Mostly. Ironman training overall has been a good experience. The same way everything crappy I've ever gone through that has made me "stronger"
Store T-Shirts Now Exist I have incredible news: We've made t-shirts. I know what you're thinking, "But Eli! I just bought 13 Snuggies! I don't even wear
Ridiculous Eli Poppins This weekend I spent some quality time with my 7 and 3 year old nieces. My sister and brother-in-law skipped town and their responsibilities for the weekend and asked if
Ironman Biking in Moab Last weekend I went south with a number of friends (Dan, Anna, and Emma) to give Paul Cyclemon a spin in Moab. I hoped Paul and I would hit it
Ironman Paul Cyclemon I purchased a bike last week. Before registering for the Ironman, I thought there were exactly 3 kinds of bikes: 1. Tricycle: I had one of these as a very small child. One day I hooked a wagon up to it, loaded my baby
Couch-surfing Video, Part 2 A few items today. First, I finally wrote a bio for the About Us page, so if you get bored enough, check it out and let me know what you think. Next, Part 2 of my couch-surfing story from The Porch [http://utahporch.org/
Ironman Open Water Torture Terrible things took place on February 25, 2012. My life will now be divided into two sections: before 10,000 daggers stabbed every part of my body at once, and
Sleeping With Serhei Video I just spent the weekend trying to swim in an icy body of water. You may have heard my screams if you were in any of the following states at the time: Utah, Colorado, Arizona, California, Nevada, Idaho, New Mexico, Being. Story to come--if
FYI Texts With A 12 Year Old I'm in the middle of a humor competition for attorneys and I'm supposed to send a short video of me attempting to be funny so a
Ridiculous Phone Upgrade Hell froze over. Long-time readers may remember my phone-purchase debacle of 2009 [http://itjustgetsstranger.blogspot.com/2009/02/1930-called-wants-its-phone-back.html] when I finally upgraded from my flip-phone to one that
Ironman Drowning in a Wet Suit Bob and Cathie are growing ever more concerned as the days go on and the May 5th doomsday approaches (Ironman). Typically beacons of hope and encouragement, they took on a
The Worst Things Ever It's time to make "The Worst Things Ever" list for 2012, so we can all focus our hate on what really matters throughout this year. I have my list below, in no particular order. Please suggest in the comments anything
Emails Emails With An Exhibitionist At the beginning of January, one of our strangers, Catherine, emailed me a link to an ad online of a guy I'll call "Jake" seeking an
FYI Ukrainian Appendectomy Podcast I mentioned a couple of weeks ago that I was going to be telling a story on The Porch. The event happened and was incredibly fun. The Porch is a
Ironman The Bod Pod Because I'm spending an inordinate amount of time putting myself through torture for a mistake I made in October (i.e., signing up for the May Ironman), all so I won't drown/die of heat exhaust/fall off of a
Yahoo Answers Yahoo! Answers Today I decided to create a couple of Yahoo! accounts (qofcolors and janesnuggies) to go onto Yahoo! Answers and ask ridiculous questions to irritate people (how did I become this
Ridiculous The First Eye vs. The Q of C I had a horrific dream last night (the word "nightmare" doesn't quite do it justice). It involved the two creatures you have all come to know and love recently, but both of which are absolutely the most terrible things that
Ironman Ironman Woes Before I rant and rave about my most recent rantworthy rave, I want to let those of you in or near the Provo area know that I will be telling my story of having major surgery in Eastern Europe on The Porch this Thursday
The Siblings The First Eye This weekend the winds of strange blew me southwest to southern California and Mexico. My friend Dan and I decided sort of last minute to roadtrip our way to the
Ridiculous 2011 2011 was good to me. It was also my strangest year to date, which is how I measure success. I believe that if I'm living my life the way I should, the best year of my life will always be the last
Ridiculous Character Defense This morning I received the following text from my mother: "Dear Eli, [Cathie always addresses me in her texts by name in case I'm not sure who she's speaking to] I read the comments some people have said about
Emails Snuggie Texts Part II The response to last week's Snuggie Texts post [http://itjustgetsstranger.blogspot.com/2011/12/snuggie-texts.html] has been very entertaining and unexpected, getting near 100,000 views in
The Siblings Snuggie Texts Perhaps because I've been in a particularly snarky mood lately, I couldn't resist last night when I got an accidental text from an unknown number. The
Emails Emails From Craigslist Part II If you missed yesterday's post, you'll want to go back and read it before you read the continuation of my back-and-forth email communication with a stranger from Craigslist who goes by the name of "Ray." Yesterday he responded
